The Scolai

“Just a Good Guy…With a Few Bad Habits”

From the “It Could Only Happen To Me” Files

with 4 comments

Nearly 15 years ago, by some Divine comedic twist of fate, I was given an indeterminate sentence at the Michigan House of Women. Over the years, my cellmates have increased from 1 to 4.  Checking out at a local grocery tonight, another possible sentence crossed my mind.

Mrs. Scolai called in a carry out order at a local restaurant and asked if I would mind picking it up. Hearing that I was going out, The Princess and Mugsy asked if I would get them a couple of things from the store. Passing through the garage, I realized my beer fridge was getting a little bare.

Imagine this: 10 minutes later, a somewhat stocky, angry looking, tattooed man places the following items before a young, sweet faced cashier:

Cosmo Girl

Teen Vogue

1 Dozen Carnations

1 Case of Beer

I think it’s a good bet Chris Hansen felt a shiver go down his spine, and that I’m now on some super secret, chain store, sex offender watch list.



Written by thescolai

February 4, 2008 at 6:26 pm

Posted in Blogroll, Life, Personal

4 Responses

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  1. You should have asked where the duct tape was just for fun.

    Driver of the Wartabago

    February 5, 2008 at 3:54 am

  2. I thought for sure you were going to say tampons somwhere in that inventory.


    February 5, 2008 at 8:24 am

  3. Next time wear your Kilt….

    William Hampton

    February 5, 2008 at 10:10 am

  4. ohhhhh where to start????

    big boy

    February 8, 2008 at 3:37 pm

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